I had a crazy idea the other day. I think I will start a new support group for fathers and call it F.F.F.F. …… The Fellowship of Fathers who Feel like Failures. If I am right, I believe the subscriptions and sign-up rate will be phenomenal. Then again, maybe I’m the only one who feels that way 😦 So what, I will be the only member then!
On Sunday, I noticed how silent a brother was after church. We were both in the same room but didn’t get to talk at all. He was busy with his kids, and me with mine. So, the next day, I made an effort to call him just to see how he was doing. In a simple phrase, he was struggling with being a dad and a husband. However hard he tried, it just didn’t seem to work. Whatever he did, it just didn’t seem to be enough. Then there were the feelings of guilt for not praying enough, not reading the bible enough, and not spending enough time with God. Not to mention the need of connecting and reconnecting with the wife, but … you-guessed-it … no time nor the energy.
Boy, did I identify with everything he shared that day. Suddenly, it hit me that I was talking to … a father who felt like a failure. Hey, a potential member of F.F.F.F.!
I am sure there are lots more out there like us. We know the right things to do, but they don’t always turn out the way those inspirational books suggest they do. In fact, I’ve had, more than once, harboured thoughts of burning those in my library. We know the right things to say to other fledging fathers and it spurs them on. But when we try it on ourselves, it just doesn’t sound as encouraging as we thought it could have been.
Hmmmm … looks like F.F.F.F. is definitely worth a shot. Indeed, I will give this more thought. But for now, daddy duty calls.